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Wednesday, December 2, 2020

Aging Graciously: Changes are never easy, but sometimes necessary - New Philadelphia Times Reporter

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When you buy a new purse or wallet, you have to investigate, reassign, transfer and get acquainted with. It is pleasant to buy the item, but getting used to it is another story. Recently I bought a purse to replace my 5-year-old-falling-apart-basic black bag. It was hard to give up the old one because I knew its innards so well.

I knew it wouldn’t be right for me to go into a store to seek my replacement. Online, where I am doing most of my shopping these days, it looked just right. There were plenty of pockets, it appeared to be the right size, and it looked casual and sturdy. Just what I was looking for. I hate it!

While there seems to be a place for everything and everything in its place, (I am a stickler about that ... it’s my fondest dream) I can’t find anything. The pockets seem to move and have no logical order for phone, wallet, checkbook and cosmetics. Zipper pockets on the outside are too small to hold anything of consequence, and the bag itself if big and clunky with confusing closing snaps.

The same might hold true for new refrigerators, kitchen cupboards, closets and computers. There is that adjustment period that sometimes seems to take forever. Being creatures of habit, we keep going back to the old ways of doing things, trying to use the same old pockets. For example, the fluorescent light above my sink died recently. It is the light I use more than any other in the kitchen. I have not gone out to replace it yet, and even though it has been more than a week, I still turn it on  every time I start to work at the sink.

Watch your pets get confused when you change their routines. My dog recently had to have six teeth pulled. He had to change from kibble to soft food, much to his amazement, since he had never tasted the “good” stuff before. Will I be able to get him back to kibble? I doubt it. I guess it’s my routine that has actually been disrupted.

Isn’t it the same with relationships? Don’t we have to investigate, get acquainted with and accept the newness? Shouldn’t we try to choose wisely in the first place, and then accept the differences, instead of regretting that we don’t have the old model?

We are struggling with bigger adjustments than fumbling through a purse or wallet,  changing an animal’s routine or making a new friend. Suddenly we have to choose when and how we leave the house, where we can go and under what circumstances. We are at the mercy of other’s criteria and rules. May we open or may we not? How much distance do we need? Are our rights being violated or is it really for our own good?

The Pandemic is tiresome. We have had to give up our activities and person to person contact in the name of health and safety. It is hard to make that change. I want to go back to the theater, the church, the book club, writer’s group and the gym. Everyone wants to return to their “normal” routines. We want to hug our friends and families once again. We are living in a virtual world through Zoom, YouTube and Face Time.

We can learn here. By the next time, and there will be a next time, we should have learned to listen, to investigate and to get acquainted with. Next time, we should be willing to change our routines more quickly and easily; should be willing to sacrifice the old bag and be careful in choosing the new. And then we should be able to move forward.

As for me today, I’m going to be right back online looking for a better black bag. I’ll get it right one of these days.

(Editor's note: If you know of a senior who is unique and deserves a story, please e-mail Lee Elliott at leeadirects@roadrunner.com. Please include contact information so she can share their story with our readers.)

The Link Lonk


December 02, 2020 at 05:07PM
https://www.timesreporter.com/story/news/2020/12/02/lee-elliott-change-never-easy-but-necessary/6464967002/

Aging Graciously: Changes are never easy, but sometimes necessary - New Philadelphia Times Reporter

https://news.google.com/search?q=easy&hl=en-US&gl=US&ceid=US:en

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